


You Steal My Stuff You Show Me The Goods

by ladilol



Category: Original Work
Genre: F/M, Home Invasion, POV Male Character, Possible Threesome, Snippy Female
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-08
Updated: 2012-11-08
Packaged: 2017-11-18 05:04:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/557177
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ladilol/pseuds/ladilol
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Most people would think about how to protect themselves or just be too scared to think when they realize they're faced with being in an old, creepy house, whose neighborhood they're not used to yet; have no weapons to protect them, are stranded without a car, and completely alone.</p><p>'The girl clicked her tongue. “Well, I wasn’t sure if you’re rapists or something. I guess you’re not… So I guess you would be offended…”</p><p>“I’m not showing my cock to a little girl.” his elder companion said flatly.</p><p>The thinner of the two honestly didn’t know how to process all this at that moment.'</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Steal My Stuff You Show Me The Goods

The tell-tale crash through the window of the old house should have alerted anyone awake to the new, and unwanted presence in the house, two dark figures crawling in through the broken window with some difficulty. The first of the two, though cloaked in darkness, was obviously a little more portly than their accomplice, who slid through the window with a little more ease. 

It was with the first step they took that they realized this job would be difficult if there was anyone home, awake, or a light sleeper. The floorboards squeaked and creaked and groaned with every step. The thinner of the two tried to pussy-foot at first, only for his partner to glare at him angrily, prompting him to halt. Making a motion for the other to forget walking carefully, he took the lead and headed forward to begin putting anything that looked valuable into his bag, his thinner companion rushing after him and wincing with each squeak and creak.

There were a few interesting and worthy things that they could carry- a ipad, an expensive looking purse or two-, and a few things that would take too much effort to tote out if the house was occupied. But this wasn’t a big job. It was a small theft meant to be a ‘get-in-get-out’ situation. Only things they could carry. 

It was only when they came to the end of the living room that the chubbier of the two realized that they’d approached some stairs, which looked just as creaky as the floorboards of the first floor. Every other stair was lit with a fake, flickering candle, which provided convienient lighting.

It looked suspicious to the thinner of the two, but the chubbier male didn’t seem to mind, only grinning as he made his way onto the first step, the wood groaning and the thinner male silently moaning worriedly into his hand. He didn’t want to get caught. He didn’t want to hurt anyone-

But his partner had assured that if there was anyone home, it would only be females. They would be easy to detain. Whip out their guns and flash them around and they would be useless to do much else except let them loot. And the thinner of the two had been settled with that information.

But still…

The creaking of the stairs was even louder than the creaking of the floors, the soft orange glow of the candles making their shadows vaguely dance on the wall next to them. 

They were both sure the home was completely empty, there wasn’t any sound coming from any of the rooms. No scrabbling to find a place to hide, no cocking of a gun, no sounds of movement at all. 

It wasn’t until the heavier of the two approached the door right across from him that a voice shattered their assumption.

“I just want to let you know,” the voice was muffled by the door the pudgier of the two was about to go into, but obviously female. “That you two are terrible at sneaking around.”

Silence seemed to echo in the old house, thin and thick males honestly shocked by the almost nonchalant information, the elder’s hand frozen just before the knob, and the younger’s heart pounding in his chest.

Eyes moving down through his ski mask, the thinner realized that light had been coming from under the door of the room, and cursed his own stupidity.

Before he could try to encourage his partner to back away from the door and for them to just leave, the door seemed to open on its own, light flooding into the dark hallway.

They both needed to blink a few times in order to see again, but even when their vision had cleared, the girl had only peeked her head out of the doorway, her eyes visible to them.

“No offense. The house is really creaky…” she informed them like they hadn’t already known that, her eyes looking over them-maybe trying to remember what they looked like so that she could tell the police? But they had masks on so that was useless…-. 

“So, I have the police on speed dial-“

The smooth slide of the pudgy man’s gun being drawn from its holster stopped the girl’s words in their tracks, eyes drawn to the black metal immediately, obviously shocked from what the thinner accomplice could see.

“Listen, little girl.” his older partner sneered, pointing the gun in her face-what they could see of it-, making her eyes cross. “You ‘aint gonna call the police. Yer gonna sit in yer room, and let us do what we came here for.”

She blinked twice, then looked at the elder of the two men with a look the thinner one couldn’t describe.

“You didn’t let me finish.” she said, sounding offended-odd, since there was a gun being pointed at her-, but her voice did tremble on her words. Which meant she was nervous. “I have the police on speed dial, but I know you’re going to shoot me if I call them.” she peeked out a little more out of the door, a few strings of black hair coming with her. The thinner of the two could see her skin was dark now, and some of her lips. “See? There, you wouldn’t have had to pulled out your gun if you’d just listened, right?”

His partner said nothing, still holding the gun firmly in her face.

“Right. So, I’m sure we both know that even if you shoot me, that the police would have already been called and would trace this location. And I have a grandmother coming in two hours, and a mother alerted that something may happen to me. And no one is going to rest until I’m found. I also have an uncle in the police force, so…” she made a motion that could have been a shrug, and the thinner male suddenly felt sick. “It would be best if we treated this whole situation delicately.

“That being said, I have a proposition for the both of you.”

“A proposition?” his partner scoffed, sounding darkly amused. “What kind of deal could a little girl like you make to interest me?”

“Simple.” she said, and there was a soft amusement in her own voice. “Pull down your pants and show me your dicks.” 

The thinner of the two choked on his breath, his face growing hot under his mask. Had- had she really just said-

“…What?” his older companion asked, sounding confused. And he couldn’t blame him.

“Pull down your pants,” she repeated, still sounding so casual about it, like she was talking about the weather. “And show me your dicks. That way, there’s no conflict, you can keep whatever you took so far, and we’re all happy.”

“Happ-?! Little girl, what makes you think we’re gonna pull down our pants and whip out our cocks so easily?!” the pudgier man growled in disbelief.

The girl clicked her tongue. “Well, I wasn’t sure if you’re rapists or something. I guess you’re not… So I guess you would be offended…”

“I’m not showing my cock to a little girl.” his elder companion said flatly.

The thinner of the two honestly didn’t know how to process all this at that moment. 

“I’m not a little girl.” the girl frowned, tucking the few strands of hair out of view, before opening the door and standing up straight enough to show that she was indeed slightly dark skinned, her hair long dark and wild as though someone had been ruffling it constantly. Her striped shirt laid a little too big on her, revealing a shoulder, and the size of her chest was easily noticeable through it. “I’m old enough to know about sex you know…”

She seemed to officially notice the thinner of the two and sent him a little smile-making him freeze up nervously-, before looking back to his larger partner, her smile turning more into a challenge.

“I’m just curious to see one. I’ve only seen drawn ones in hentai and eroge and in real porn videos.” she reached out a hand slowly-as if approaching a small animal, which his partner was not-, and laid it on what the thinner male assumed was his chest. He couldn’t really see. “It’d be nice to see them in real life…” the soft slide of fabric let the thinner male know her hand was sliding down the black front of the other. “It’s fair right? I give you my things without calling the cops and you show me your anatomy? That’s the saying, right?”

“That’s not the saying…” his partner’s voice was gruff in a way he had never heard it before, and the girl’s smile deepened. The thinner robber noticed her hips fidget slightly, doing a soft rocking motion.

“It isn’t?” she hummed, her tongue peeking out to flick at her bottom lip, and she moved a little closer to him, still holding onto the door handle. “Oh well~ Silly me… So… Do we have a deal, Mr…?”

“…Patterson,” his partner provided falsely. But even if it was a false name, it shocked him. He was giving a fake name? Wasn’t he going to refuse the girls’ offer-? “And yeah, we got a deal.”

The girl’s eyes practically sparkled, and bit her lip excitedly, her hips wiggling again. 

“Yes-! Okay! Just- wait here!” she chirped, closing her door behind her and moving towards and past the thinner robber-almost giving him a heart attack-to turn on the light in the hallway, then moving to the door next to him with a smile thrown at them over her shoulder. “Let me brush my teeth! I mean- I don’t like talking to people usually unless I do that, and this is such a special occasion! Be back in a few minutes. Please don’t steal anything from up here, okay~?”

And the girl opened the door, then closed it. The sound of water, then an electronic tooth brush had to come on before the thinner robber approached his stock still companion.

“Wh-what are you thinking?!” he hissed, hands moving wildly. “A-are we really going to show her our-?!”

“Quiet.” ‘Patterson’ snapped, eyes trained on the door, a faint humming over the buzzing of the toothbrush could be heard. It could have been a song. “Just-… Just roll with it. She’s not that bad to look at so…”

“So? So?! We shouldn’t- That’s so degrading-“

“I said quiet!” ‘Patterson growled, turning a glare through his ski mask at him. He looked away from the panicking robber when the door opened, the girl smiling at them just as excitedly as she had been doing before. It was more obvious now that she had a few smatterings of acne here and there, but not too noticeable unless you tried to figure out where. 

“Well, let’s take this too the living room, shall we? I only have one curtain in my room so the other window can be seen through. And grandma will know something happened in her room if we did it in there.” she informed, clicking off the light in the bathroom and making her way to the stairs. 

She paused suddenly with a little ‘oh’, and looked over her shoulder at the thinner one with a smile.

“What’s your name, mister?”

The thinner opened and closed his mouth. Were they going to do this? Were they going to show their dicks to this girl in exchange for the small amount of things they’d collected?

He glanced at his partner, who kept staring at the girl.

“…Silver…” he mumbled, and the girl nodded, before moving down the stairs carefully, his pudgier partner following right after her.

The thinner man mentally groaned. 

Apparently, they were.

((A/N: Okay, so… I may write more to this, haha. And I’m not kidding, this is what I thought about tonight. Two robbers coming in and me offering them to take their pants off and show me their anatomy in exchange for what they took so far. I honestly think that’s what I would do if it really happened. And I would try to coax more out of them too. I really am curious enough to do it honestly. It’s better than being killed or having my laptop stolen. MUCH better…

Lord I’m such a perverted and morbid person…

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: I honestly thought about doing this to robbers if they suddenly broke into my grandmother's house... I may continue this, if people would actually want to see the mature scenes that unfolded in my head... haha~


End file.
